The Memories You’ll Leave
August 25th, 2010 | 
Author: Two leaders in my life passed away this month. Both were too young and healthy to leave us. Following the shock of the loss, I have been thinking about the memories we leave behind when we pass on.
Both of these people were phenomenal human beings. Their lives were lived with a focus and devotion to others. Not in a Mother Theresa sort of way, but in an every day, normal human-being sort of way.
Who we’ll remember
Tadd, a coach who had worked with my firm, was always ready to greet with a hug. Upbeat and positive, people loved being around him. Some of his former clients wrote to me following his death to tell me of the impact he’d made on them; one said the coaching he had done with her was life changing. When he passed, the service was filled with leaders in the community whose lives he’d touched deeply, all telling similar stories.
Rick, our neighbor, dedicated his life to teaching college students chemistry; the impact he made on their lives was obvious by the tributes they wrote about him. He would come over and visit Edgar the Leadership Pug and chat with us, often speaking of the beauty that surrounds us here. He took care of the stray cats that seem to make their way to our area, and walked another neighbor’s dogs when that neighbor worked long hours. A college auditorium was filled for his memorial service.
Why am I telling you this? Both of these stellar human beings had an irresistible presence. You could feel it the second they approached you. It was calming and compassionate. It made you want to be around them. This is the wonderful memory they’ve left for the rest of us who are still living.
What are the memories you’ll leave?
So before the stress of your daily fire drill causes you to get angry with your team; before you cuss at the driver in the Hummer that cut in front of you; before you lash out at your teenager for doing “something stupid” – take a breath. Consider what you want others to remember about you when you leave this earth.
Refer to that important future memory often and live out your life in accordance with it. Life, as they say, is too short. You have the opportunity to make an impact every minute of every day if you stay aware of what you are living for.
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10 Responses to “The Memories You’ll Leave”
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A simple post with a profound reminder. Last year, I lost a dear friend who was a doctor. A few weeks after his death, one of his patients came over one day to meet his parents and said, “When I was admitted to the hospital, your son healed me with his smile, attitude and jovial ways of interacting more than he did with his prescriptions”. That was his legacy and the one that led me to think about it.
Each day, each moment is an opportunity to create an impact. Thanks for this post MJ!
Best,
Tanmay
indeed, I’m always stuck by the human capacity to contribute positively to others. The leaders in my life have given me faith, hope and aspiration. Dark days will always come, but with other people’s humanity they leave nothing but small puddles.
thanks for reminding us of our potential for humanity MJ!
have happy day
mole
What a wonderful message with so many stories of loss around us, Mary Jo. List yourself with living heroes – for the ways you encourage and help so many of us.
What a wonderful reminder that today is the first day of the rest of our lives, and we can make a difference! Thanks for the inspiration to do just that!
Tanmay, thanks for the story. Your friend seems to have left a wonderful legacy.
Mole, yes – an important thing, to remember our humanity. Its in all of us.
Ellen, you are such a great encourager. We’re all on the same journey, and we all need reminders that we can make a difference. Thanks for the difference you make!
Thank you for the reminder Mary Jo.
The inevitable situation of experiencing loss always elicits moments of reflection. As life passes by, and we are constantly striving for what is just beyond our reach, we oftentimes forget about the small intricate moments of our life that are the most endearing. Unfortunately, it is at the result of loss when we realize how much we truly cherished. It isn’t until the moment when they are gone, when you realize how impacted your life has become because you have been blessed to have known that individual. For that, I try to be conscious and appreciate every opportunity to treasure the beauty of small moments in life.
As leaders, we are in the valued position to make a tremendous impression. I hope and strive to ensure that my impression is positive. I remain mindful to always smile and beam with joy, and for that, I hope that those I encounter will remember me for my warmth and optimism.
Kindly,
Carla
Carla, beautifully written. Thanks for your comments.
I really enjoyed reading your brief but yet so profound post. I recently lost an uncle who was very close to my heart and always felt more like a grandfather to me. I remembered thinking at the time of his passing how wonderful it was that he made such a great impact on those around him. He was a hard working, intelligent, sweet, and compassionate human-being. Actually, thinking about it makes me teary eyed even now. I want to remember that what we do now is important because that is how those around us will remember us. It doesn’t serve us any good to walk around angry or bitter at the world. It only adds stress and harm to yourself. I can only hope that I am remembered by those around me in the same capacity and light that my uncle was. Thank you Mary, for those great words.
Amber, I’m so sory to hear of your loss, but am glad that you have wonderful memories and are living your life in a way that others will have similar fond memories of you. Thanks for adding your thoughts.
Thank you for sharing this story Mary Jo. We are all so lucky to have people like Tadd and Rick in our lives.
Being a student who needed to acquire an internship seemed like my worst fear several years ago. The intimidation, the fear of not living up to someone else’s expectations, and the need to find a mentor who would understand me as well as my goals. After working with a physician as part of a surgery internship, it is amazing to look back over the past year and see how much I have grown just because of this person. Her willingness to share her past experiences, her eagerness to help me through troubles she experienced at my age, and her kindness and thoughtfulness in her actions, words, and advice. This is a thank you to you as well as all other people who have been willing to be a mentor to someone and change their life as well as their future. You all have no idea how much you impact the lives of so many students that look up to you and admire you for your guidance and thoughts.
Sincerely,
Carina Funk
Carina, how wonderful that you’ve had such a kind caring mentor in your life and thanks for your kind words. I wonder if you can see where you, too, have made impact in the lives of others?