It's All About The Relationship
Get our free e-book, “Working With Your
Executive Coach” when you subscribe
to our leadership newsletter.
Enter Your Email Address
Contact Us

All Top


Ask First

Leadership Digital

Now, Embrace Your Weaknesses

Thanks to the Gallup organization, hoards of leaders have been discovering and using their strengths. I really like that idea. Forgive me for being a wet blanket here, but it’s unfortunate that this attention to strengths has had an (unintended?) consequence: leaders, their organizations and coaches believe that by focusing on an individual’s strengths, their weaknesses become irrelevant.

Weaknesses are important too

As much as I love spending time in the light (strengths), I believe that we must also look at…and act on… the dark (weaknesses) in order to become the best at what we do. Its hard work to take a look at this unpleasant stuff – and it’s even harder to correct it.

Almost all leaders can articulate their strengths very well. Perhaps they’ve taken the StrengthsFinder assessment, or perhaps they just know what they are good at; it’s what’s made them successful, after all.

These leaders can remember their top five talents and can speak eloquently about how their strengths help them to be good leaders.

But ask them about their weaknesses, and the conversation grinds to a halt. Somewhere, deep inside like the oil slick lurking at the bottom of the Gulf, they have weaknesses that are waiting to surface under appropriate circumstances (and often, they already have). These weaknesses, if left undiscovered or untouched by a plan to correct them, can make a mess of things.

Your stakeholders know

Even if you can’t articulate your weaknesses, there is no lack of stakeholders who are willing to do so for you. Managers, peers, employees, and customers can speak to what your weaknesses are; I know this because I’ve talked to many of these stakeholders on behalf of my clients. It is not unusual for their list of my client’s weaknesses to be longer than their list of strengths.

In fact, much of the time, a leader’s weaknesses are actually strengths that have been overdone (a common example is the client who is proud of the fact that they always speaks the truth. Their stakeholders say that this client’s weakness is that they are too direct, and need to learn to soften the blow of their words).

Embracing the dark side

I’m making a case here for discovering – and embracing – the dark side of you, too. If you don’t make the effort becoming self-aware enough to know what your weaknesses are, you just can’t get better at leadership. In most cases, discovering and using your strengths isn’t enough. You must work at moderating or eliminating your weaknesses too.  

So take that multi-rater feedback assessment. Discover and embrace your weaknesses. Hire a coach to help you figure out what to take action on and to hold you accountable for eliminating or moderating your weaknesses. Go ahead; I promise it’ll be good for you.

6 Responses to “Now, Embrace Your Weaknesses”

  • Mary Jo –
    Thanks for adding your voice to the “weaknesses matter” side of the debate. Yes, maximizing your strenghts will make you happier – and that’s important – but it won’t make you better. High performers are always aware of and working on their weaknesses.

  • Dan, thanks for stopping over and adding your concurrence. Honestly – I wouldn’t know how to assist a client if all we worked on were their strengths.

  • I’m with Dan, thanks for adding your voice to conversation on this. Building on your strengths is a good strategy, but if that’s all you do you won’t be very effective. In a personal development context you need to discover your weaknesses so you can consciously work on the most important ones. And in a team context you need to discover them so you can work to make them irrelevant.

  • Thanks for adding your thoughts, Wally. I would agree that becoming “conscious” of weaknesses in order to “consciously” work on them is important. What I’ve found is that many prefer to stick their heads in the sand!

  • […] on a program for becoming a better leader. The next step is to actively work to replace those negative behavioral habits with some positive […]

  • […] good, bad and the ugly need to be reflected upon. Know your strengths, and be vigilant about your weaknesses. Use of self assessments and 360’s are a good way to […]

Leave a Reply

Please leave these two fields as-is:

Protected by Invisible Defender. Showed 403 to 184,755 bad guys.

Mary Jo Asmus
Mary Jo
A former executive in a Fortune 100 company, I own and operate a leadership solutions firm called Aspire Collaborative Services. We partner with great leaders to help them become even greater at developing, improving, and sustaining relationships with the people who are essential to their success. This blog is for leaders and those who help them to be more intentional about relationships at work. I am married, have two daughters, and a dog named Edgar the Leadership Pug who exemplifies the importance of relationships to great leadership.
View my complete profile