My Thanksgiving


This will be my last post in 2009; I have decided to take a break until after January 1, 2010. This post is a bit more personal (and therefore a bit more uncomfortable for me) than most. But I`ve been inspired by Don Henley`s “My Thanksgiving” lyrics for many years, and happened to hear them again today; it seemed appropriate for the end of one year and the beginning of the next. My favorite passages from that song:

Because I’m tired of waiting for reason to arrive
It’s too long we’ve been living
These unexamined lives
I’ve got great expectations
I’ve got family and friends
I’ve got satisfying work
I’ve got a back that bends
For every breath, for every day of living
This is my Thanksgiving

Here in this fragmented world, I still believe
In learning how to give love, and how to receive it
And I would not be among those who abuse this privilege
Sometimes you get the best light from a burning bridge
And I don’t mind saying that I still love it all
I wallowed in the springtime
Now I’m welcoming the fall

For every moment of joy
Every hour of fear
For every winding road that brought me here
For every breath, for every day of living
This is my Thanksgiving
For everyone who helped me start
And for everything that broke my heart
For every breath, for every day of living
This is my Thanksgiving

(Listen to the full set of lyrics with Don Henley in a great video here.)

My gratitude list is built, a little at a time, daily. At the end of each day, I make a brief bulleted list in a personal journal of at least five things or people that I`m grateful for. Even the stuff that most people would be mad, sad, upset or frustrated about get a vote as I consider what I`m learning from them. I highly recommend this “journaling” to everyone; it has been a life-altering experience for me.

If I had to sum up the top ten for this year, here are the things that get my highest votes of deep gratitude in 2009:

  1. My family: A few years ago, my husband and I made a strategic decision not to move. We are blessed to have both of our recently married daughters and some wonderful sons-in-law in the area, and to have them over for laughs and good food almost every Sunday evening. My thanksgiving extends to my sisters Judy and Amy.
  2. The ability to make a difference: Is it arrogant to say that I believe I make an impact in the work and lives of the people I work with? I am so grateful to be able to touch lives in this way, with the work I do.
  3. The joy of writing: 2009 is the year that I discovered that writing can be fun. After years of writing a newsletter, blog and column, I get a lot of satisfaction in writing; particularly now that someone is reading it.
  4. The leaders who inspire my writing: All of my life I`ve been a people-observer. And I`ve been blessed to know and observe some really amazing leaders who inspire the things I write about. You know who you are.
  5. Social Media: This helped make #3 possible. Before Twitter, which I discovered in June of this year, I had very few readers for the blog. And I love the conversations and new learning I get from those who are willing to comment on the blog.
  6. My Health: Yes, including my aching back. It has been a year of challenge and high medical bills for my back. However, I`m grateful that it still bends, and reminding me that I am human and alive. It helps me to find joy in every day; even those that are painful.
  7. New and Old Friends: In the seven years since I left the corporate world, the people who surround me are almost all new and all are amazing. You are the positive people in my life who uplift me, give me strength and inspire me.
  8. To Be Okay ?€“ Financially speaking. Yes, 2009 was among the most challenging years my husband and I have experienced in our time together; we both own and operate businesses (in Michigan). But we made enough to eat, put clothes on our backs and continued to pay the mortgage (We are sad for those who weren`t as blessed, and do what we can to help out).
  9. My personal history: Really, my upbringing was pretty weird, often perilous, and emotionally painful. Everyone comes from a dysfunctional family in some way, but mine should be a case study (if I ever get brave enough, I`ll write a memoir). The road I`ve travelled has been unexpected and wonderful. Its brought me to the place I am now, and I`m pretty happy here.
  10. Beautiful Michigan and wonderful Kalamazoo: Springtime, fall, winter (that includes snow), and summer! This is an amazing place to live in – four beautiful seasons, and a city that cares enough to support all of it’s young people with full scholarships to college after high school.

Look back on the year. What is your thanksgiving? See you in the new year!

JQEX3DQHKBPU



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8 Responses to “My Thanksgiving”

  • Such a great list, Mary Jo. Thank you so much for all the wisdom and encouragement you have shared this year. I am grateful for you and for your space here, where you continue to add value each time you post. It has been so amazing to share this journey with you as your blog has taken off this year. I look forward to what 2010 will bring.

  • Mary Jo Asmus:

    Becky, although I didn’t specifically mention you, you are one of those that I am thankful for. You are one of the most supportive people I know, as shown by your response here. Thank you for all you do for me and for others.

  • Mary Jo, thank you for sharing this. When I started down my blogging path back in September, your’s was the first blog that I stuck with, all because of the amount of ‘you’ that you put into it. I’m grateful for having found you and being able to share with you on a daily basis. Enjoy your holidays!!

  • Mary Jo Asmus:

    Tom, I am grateful and humbled for your support. Warm wishes for a wonderful holiday.

  • A very inspiring list, Mary Jo. As I read each item, I reflected on how it applied in my own life. Your #1 is mine also. Our daughter lives close by, and we cherish our weekly get-togethers with her. I’m also lucky that my own parents and some of my siblings live nearby and we see them often, too.

    I’m thankful to have found you and your blog this year, and I eagerly await the wisdom you’ll share in upcoming posts. Hope you have a special holiday with your family and create lots of positive memories!

  • I agree with Becky, Mary Jo, that this is a wonderful list. Although there’s a bit more of a personal side to this post compared to others, the fact is that in all of our pieces, you have shed some light on who you are. Sometimes it was evident through the stories or people you’d mention in your pieces, but mostly it’s because it was obvious in your writings that you were writing about what mattered to you; a very telling indicator about who you are and why so many of us have enjoyed reading your blog and getting to know the person behind the posts.

    So, thank you for not only sharing your insights, but also those glimpses into who you are.

    Wishing you and your family all the best for the holidays. Looking forward to seeing what ideas you share in 2010.

    Tanveer.

  • This is unreal. Beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. We moved to Michigan from California and could have retired anywhere in the country. We chose Michigan and love Michigan. And try to continue and invest.

    We are grateful, humbled, invested and hopeful. I am so happy to know you – and look forward to many more fun and engaging coffees together.

    Dee

  • Meredith, How wonderful to have your family around you. And thank you for your kind words.

    Tanveer, thank you. Its hard to write posts that are “all about me”. I won’t do many of them, but this one seemed right for the end of 2009. Thanks for your encouragement.

    Deirdre, Michigan is lucky to have you, your husband and Samson; you are such a great ambassador! And I’m glad to have met you. I’m looking forward to more fun coffees together in the future!

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Mary Jo Asmus
Mary Jo
A former executive in a Fortune 100 company, I own and operate a leadership solutions firm called Aspire Collaborative Services. We partner with great leaders to help them become even greater at developing, improving, and sustaining relationships with the people who are essential to their success. This blog is for leaders and those who help them to be more intentional about relationships at work. I am married, have two daughters, and a dog named Edgar the Leadership Pug who exemplifies the importance of relationships to great leadership.
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