Archive for the ‘Introverts’ Category

I’m pretty sure I’ve come close to draining my emotional bank account with Rick Chambers. He wrote an amazing piece for this blog back in November called “The Secret of Leadership: Do Nothing” that received so much more attention than anything I’ve ever written. So I asked (begged) him to write about his personal experience of being an introverted leader; his wonderful thoughts follow.

Rick is a director of Worldwide Communications for a Fortune 500 who has worked in the public relations field for more than 22 years. An award winning journalist, he is also a published author and an award-winning short-story writer. Rick is a native of Kalamazoo, Michigan. You can find out more about him on his LinkedIn profile.

Oh, and I owe him lunch (or maybe that’s plural).

A few years ago, my mom bumped into a former junior-high teacher of mine, and he quizzed her about my career in corporate public relations.

“Back when Rick was my student, if you`d told me he was going to grow up to be a media spokesperson for a major corporation, I never would have believed it,” he said.

Can`t say I blame him. Speaking to a key audience or facing the business end of a news camera is the kind of job you`d expect to give to a handsome, charming extrovert, the kind of guy who is comfortable and energized in a crowd.

I`m not that guy.

Look up “introvert” in your Webster`s, and you`ll find my picture. (Actually, you won`t?€”I didn`t show up for the photo session.) I`m the one hovering on the edge of a noisy room during a social hour, the one who collapses in his hotel room exhausted by a crowded conference, who is invigorated by a solo walk in the forest and ranks “networking” right up there with “prostate exam.”

Okay, I`m overstating it. A little. I care about the company I work for, I care about my colleagues, and I care about the people we serve. I want to do my best to build dialogue, nurture relationships and learn from them, which is what true public relations is about. Indeed, it`s what leadership is about. The challenge for me is admitting I approach those things in a different way than an extrovert might.

Such an admission came only after years of trying to remake my image. I copycatted my extroverted friends. My dad is a retired auto salesman, and I tried ripping off his mannerisms. In all of this, I failed miserably. I felt like a fake. Small talk was exhausting, networking was a chore, and I felt deeply inferior to colleagues who seemingly won friends and influenced people with ease.

But then, over time, came a realization. With maturity and sound advice from wise people, I began to learn that denying my introverted “wiring” was denying myself?€”and robbing others of the value I could bring.

An introvert`s tendency to carefully weigh answers and options is an asset in communication. An introvert`s wish for a deeper understanding of an issue or a person makes her or him a great resource, as well as considerably self aware. My introversion has made me a better writer. And understanding where I gain energy (in solitude) or expend it (in crowds) has improved the value I gain from, and give to, both.

In short, I`ve learned that neither the introvert nor the extrovert is a better leader than the other. Each is needed. Each has something to teach the other. Each brings important assets to leadership?€”assets that are applied more effectively if the leader works from a clear understanding and acceptance of how he or she is created.

I`ve learned a great deal from extroverted leaders. Indeed, I`m constantly amazed by their unique gifts. But knowing that an introvert can bring equal value is a welcome affirmation of who I am and what I provide to my career, to my colleagues and to this life.

Jennifer B. Kahnweiler, Ph.D. is the author of “The Introverted Leader: Building on Your Quiet Strength”. I had purchased the book as a possible resource for my introverted clients, who often express that they are “misunderstood” or “don’t fit in”. This is also an excellent book for extraverted leaders who may need to better understand the significant gifts of the introverts at work and in their lives.

Dr. Kahnweiler’s web site “AboutYOU, Inc.” has additional resources, and be sure to subscribe to her Introverted Leader Blog. She was kind enough to answer a few questions about the book and the strengths of these quiet leaders:

What was important enough about this topic that inspired you to write a book about it?

In today`s extroverted business world, introverts can feel ignored, overlooked, and misunderstood. In fact, according to my research?€”a two-and-a-half-year national study of introverted professionals?€”four out of five introverts say extroverts are more likely to get ahead in their workplace. What`s more, over 40 percent say they would like to change their introverted tendencies, but don`t know where or how to begin. I wanted to help make that a little easier. I also have found it especially satisfying to work with introverted clients.

What are the strengths that introverts can bring to leadership?

Here are five key assets they bring:

1. They think first, talk later. Introverted leaders think before they speak. Even in casual conversation, they consider others` comments carefully, and stop and reflect before responding. Their tendency to be more measured with words is a major asset in today`s recession, when no leader can afford to make a costly gaffe.
2. They focus on depth. Introverted leaders seek depth over breadth. They like to dig deep?€”delving into issues and ideas before moving on to new ones. They are drawn to meaningful conversations?€”not superficial chit-chat?€”and know how to ask great questions and really listen to people`s answers.
3. They exude calm. Introverted leaders are low-key. In times of crisis, they project a reassuring, calm confidence?€”think President Obama?€”and regardless of the heat of the conversation or circumstances, speak softly and slowly.
4. They let their fingers do the talking. Introverted leaders prefer writing to talking. They opt for e-mail over the telephone and meet face-to-face only when necessary. Today, their comfort with the written word helps them better leverage online social networking tools such as Twitter?€”creating new opportunities to be “out there” with employees as they deal with uncertainty and fear.
5. They embrace solitude. Introverted leaders are energized by spending time alone. Sufferers of people exhaustion, they frequently need to retreat to recharge their batteries. These regular timeouts fuel their thinking, creativity, and decision-making, and when the pressure is on, help them be responsive?€” not reactive.

What do introverts need to be able to do to thrive in the extroverted business world?

The goal is not changing your personality or natural work style, but embracing and expanding who you are. As an ongoing framework, follow the “4 P`s”: preparation (devising game plans); presence (focusing on the moment); push (stretching and growing); and practice (rehearsing and refining new skills).

What advice do you have for introverted leaders around relationship building?

Use social networking to set the stage. Technology is a great tool for for preparing to meet people. Use social networking sites to set the stage for connecting with others in person at meetings and events. You can introduce yourself, find common ground and send helpful “news you can use” items – all in a low key yet friendly way.