Comments on: A Dialog With Your Manager http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager Thu, 09 Sep 2010 23:43:13 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: nathaniel heisler http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-734 nathaniel heisler Mon, 01 Feb 2010 23:53:37 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-734 I found this information useful. The communication between a manager and an employee can be somewhat difficult to achieve. I know that I’ve had that boss that I just can’t convey any information to. I will most likely use these tactics in the future, both as an employee and as a manager. For me, not being able to come up with a tactful approach to convey information without seeming unintelligent is my biggest flaw. The trick I realize now is to approach with confidence and know what to say and how to say it ahead of time. I found this information useful. The communication between a manager and an employee can be somewhat difficult to achieve. I know that I’ve had that boss that I just can’t convey any information to. I will most likely use these tactics in the future, both as an employee and as a manager. For me, not being able to come up with a tactful approach to convey information without seeming unintelligent is my biggest flaw. The trick I realize now is to approach with confidence and know what to say and how to say it ahead of time.

]]> By: Christine Livingston http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-733 Christine Livingston Tue, 26 Jan 2010 13:28:11 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-733 Hi Mary Jo I think that a lot of corporations have fostered very parent-child cultures and that we've all, too readily, bought into them. It's time to stop seeing ourselves as children and take our adult power back. It's there that we're more resourceful and confident. We owe it to our bosses too to see them as adults and have the conversation from that place. Hi Mary Jo

I think that a lot of corporations have fostered very parent-child cultures and that we’ve all, too readily, bought into them. It’s time to stop seeing ourselves as children and take our adult power back. It’s there that we’re more resourceful and confident. We owe it to our bosses too to see them as adults and have the conversation from that place.

]]> By: Mary Jo Asmus http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-732 Mary Jo Asmus Mon, 25 Jan 2010 22:46:18 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-732 Chris, the point really is that you can't MAKE a manager do anything, much less be open to feedback. But you can change the way you approach the situation. It doesn't guarantee results, but its your best shot. Note Kevin's comment, below. Bret, I like your point about "not surrendering your dignity". Its easy to do that in a heirarchical organization. Kevin, Thanks, and great points! Susan, great thought and addition to "speak from a position of commitment". Most people in an organization want to do the right thing - part of that commitment. Tanveer, the wisdom you provide is much needed. Really getting ourselves to understand that this doesn't have to be a confrontational stance - and intending a conversation or dialog instead - will go a long way toward setting the stage for that potentially frightening conversation with the manager. Chris, the point really is that you can’t MAKE a manager do anything, much less be open to feedback. But you can change the way you approach the situation. It doesn’t guarantee results, but its your best shot. Note Kevin’s comment, below.

Bret, I like your point about “not surrendering your dignity”. Its easy to do that in a heirarchical organization.

Kevin, Thanks, and great points!

Susan, great thought and addition to “speak from a position of commitment”. Most people in an organization want to do the right thing – part of that commitment.

Tanveer, the wisdom you provide is much needed. Really getting ourselves to understand that this doesn’t have to be a confrontational stance – and intending a conversation or dialog instead – will go a long way toward setting the stage for that potentially frightening conversation with the manager.

]]> By: Tanveer Naseer http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-731 Tanveer Naseer Mon, 25 Jan 2010 17:04:48 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-731 Mary Jo, there's a very important point that you bring up in this piece, of approaching this conversation as a dialog, not a confrontation. I think for many people that's the biggest obstacle they see - of perceiving such action as akin to picking a fight, as opposed to attempting to improve the situation. Also, by coming into the conversation with the internal understanding that you only want to have a conversation to help your boss, you're more likely to be receptive to their initial resistance since you know you're there to help them, not to point fingers. Having that kind of clarity of purpose going in should help greatly in overcoming any concerns of a confrontation since your body language will naturally being demonstrating the opposite. Another enjoyable post, Mary Jo. Thanks for sharing. Mary Jo, there’s a very important point that you bring up in this piece, of approaching this conversation as a dialog, not a confrontation. I think for many people that’s the biggest obstacle they see – of perceiving such action as akin to picking a fight, as opposed to attempting to improve the situation.

Also, by coming into the conversation with the internal understanding that you only want to have a conversation to help your boss, you’re more likely to be receptive to their initial resistance since you know you’re there to help them, not to point fingers. Having that kind of clarity of purpose going in should help greatly in overcoming any concerns of a confrontation since your body language will naturally being demonstrating the opposite.

Another enjoyable post, Mary Jo. Thanks for sharing.

]]> By: Susan Mazza http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-730 Susan Mazza Mon, 25 Jan 2010 16:29:07 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-730 We do have an important choice to make. And when we hide behind the excuses that are born of fear we are essentially choosing to reinforce the status quo. I'll add that bosses (or anyone for that matter) will also be a lot more likely to be open to and hear what we have to say if we speak to them from a context of their commitments, making our commitment to them and the success of our team or organization explicit. We do have an important choice to make. And when we hide behind the excuses that are born of fear we are essentially choosing to reinforce the status quo.

I’ll add that bosses (or anyone for that matter) will also be a lot more likely to be open to and hear what we have to say if we speak to them from a context of their commitments, making our commitment to them and the success of our team or organization explicit.

]]> By: Kevin J Porer http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-729 Kevin J Porer Mon, 25 Jan 2010 16:17:04 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-729 Mary Jo, I like how you distinguish between confrontation and dialogue. The one thing we have complete control over in the workplace is our behavior. If we attempt to provide feedback with an angry, frustrated attitude, we will have little success in reaching out to the manager. However, if we consistently behave in a positive, transparent manner we are much more likely to develop a meaningful dialogue with the manager. Thanks! Kevin Mary Jo, I like how you distinguish between confrontation and dialogue. The one thing we have complete control over in the workplace is our behavior. If we attempt to provide feedback with an angry, frustrated attitude, we will have little success in reaching out to the manager. However, if we consistently behave in a positive, transparent manner we are much more likely to develop a meaningful dialogue with the manager.

Thanks!
Kevin

]]> By: Bret Simmons http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-728 Bret Simmons Mon, 25 Jan 2010 14:25:37 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-728 Great stuff, MJ! You know I believe that if you don't do stuff like this as a follower you will never appreciate this behavior in your followers when you become a leader. We simply must never surrender our dignity to anyone by seeing ourselves as anything less than a an adult in a peer relationship. Keep up the good work! Bret Great stuff, MJ! You know I believe that if you don’t do stuff like this as a follower you will never appreciate this behavior in your followers when you become a leader. We simply must never surrender our dignity to anyone by seeing ourselves as anything less than a an adult in a peer relationship. Keep up the good work! Bret

]]> By: Chris http://www.aspire-cs.com/a-dialog-with-your-manager/comment-page-1#comment-727 Chris Mon, 25 Jan 2010 13:34:29 +0000 http://www.aspire-cs.com/?p=843#comment-727 Mary, Getting a manger to the point where they are open to feedback is the hardest part. I suspect often managers are scared of feedback from their reports as it might make them appear weak or vulnerable if they took it. I also think what you are saying could equally be applied to starting dialogue with your customers (I am thinking in a professional services sector particularly.) Kind Regards, Chris Mary, Getting a manger to the point where they are open to feedback is the hardest part. I suspect often managers are scared of feedback from their reports as it might make them appear weak or vulnerable if they took it. I also think what you are saying could equally be applied to starting dialogue with your customers (I am thinking in a professional services sector particularly.)
Kind Regards,
Chris

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