Irrational Decisions – Anchoring and Arbitrary Coherence

Professor Ariely describes some experiments which demonstrated something he calls arbitrary coherence. Basically it means that once you contemplate a decision or actually make a decision, it will heavily influence your subsequent decisions. That’s the coherence part. Your brain will try to keep your decisions consistent with previous decisions you have made.

Diffusing Anger

No matter how hard we may try to avoid a volatile situation, there will come a time when you have to deal with an angry person.  Whether it’s a boss, co-worker, team member, associate, employee, customer, or even a friend, at some point you will have to handle both the anger and the underlying issues.

Using Cultural Models to Change Organisational Culture

My experience is that it can. Changing corporate culture undoubtedly requires leadership. It is useful, however, for leaders to be able to build a picture of the change required using a model of the culture. Models of a corporate culture tend to be of two types.

Leadership’s Future: Entitled To Good Grades

A recent study by researchers at the University of California, Irvine, found that a third of students surveyed said that they expected B’s just for attending lectures, and 40 percent said they deserved a B for completing the required reading. Nearly two-thirds of the students surveyed said that if they explained to a professor that they were trying hard, that should be taken into account in their grade

Too Direct? Five Ways to Dial it Back

We all appreciate a leader who is honest and direct in the way they speak. Good leaders strive for clarity and truthfulness. However, do you know that you can cross the line into what I call being overly direct An overly direct leader can be abrupt. They may not recognize when they have not provided the care and time needed to speak to others in such a way that there is a give and take in the conversation. They may appear to have an attitude of its my way or the high-way .

Do what you say you will do

I know this may seem like a small thing, but I'm here to remind you today of your commitments. A commitment is something you say that you'll do it's a promise. Committing is an important and courageous thing to do, but it's only worthwhile when you follow through and do what you promise to do. Leaders commit every day to something to meet goals, to stay within a budget, to the best job leading that they can possibly do, to learning and developing themselves. These are the big things.

Pamela Meyer: How to spot a liar

Speaker Pamela Meyer is author of Liespotting , which pulls together research on deception from a number of sources. Summary Everyone is a liar, but the goal to spotting liars isn't to trick them or play gotcha', but to understand the truth. Truth 1 Lying is a cooperative act it needs the hearer to believe. Truth 2 We are against lying and covertly for it Lying can manifest as corporate fraud, which costs nearly a trillion dollars a year in the US, or it can betray national secrets.

Kelly Mcgonigal: How To Make Stress Your Friend

Speakers Kelly McGonigal, a health psychologist known for her popular explanation of scientific research. Summary Kelly has been treating stress as a disease that makes people sick, but has now changed her tune. A study assessed people's feelings of stress, their attitude towards stress, and correlated against public death records. The people most likely to die were more stressed, but they also believed that stress was harmful to their health.

Philip Zimbardo: The Psychology Of Evil

Speaker Philip George Zimbardo is a psychologist and a professor emeritus at Stanford University. He became known for his 1971 Stanford prison experiment and has since authored various introductory psychology books, textbooks for college students, and other notable works, including The Lucifer Effect Summary People like to believe the line between good and evil is clear with them on one side, others always evil.

Observance Of The Law I

Sam Geezil of Chicago sold his warehouse business for close to 1 million. He setded down to semiretirement and the managing of his many properties, but deep inside he itched for the old days of deal-making. One day a young man named Joseph Weil visited his office, wanting to buy an apartment he had up for sale. Geezil explained the terms The price was 8,000, but he only required a down payment of 2,000.

Be a role model like Tom Hanks

Tom Hanks is well respected in the world of acting he's played roles as varied as a teenage boy in an adult body (Big) a slow witted but kind man who does fantastic things (Forest Gump) and a commercial American pilot who saves his passengers by landing his plane on a river (Sully). And there are many more, as he's played a wide variety of characters over his decades-long career. And yet in each of those roles, he brings his humanity, that part of him that we all recognize to be Tom Hanks.

Andrew Mcafee: What Will Future Jobs Look Like?

Speaker Andrew McAfee is the associate director of the Center for Digital Business at the MIT Sloan School of Management, studying the ways information technology (IT) affects businesses and business as a whole. Summary Prophecy is hard, but it is easy to see that in the future there will be more things that sound like science fiction, and fewer jobs.

Quietly revel in your success

We've all seen it the leader who takes all the credit for success and doesn't deflect any of it to the people who did the hard daily work to get there. Maybe you have been subjected to that leader who brags and lays claim to all that's been achieved without recognizing the good hard work you put in. It's not a great feeling. In fact, it's enough to cause loss of enthusiasm and engagement. Everyone knows what this puffed-up leader has and hasn't done.

The X Factor Leader

X Factor An unknown or indefinable element. With all of the hype about Simon Cowell's X Factor singing competition show opening in the U.S. this fall, I thought it would be fun to try to define what we'd see in an X Factor leader. It isn't often that we have the opportunity to observe a leader with the X Factor. The X Factor is a set of special qualities that set a leader apart from the crowd. It's something followers wish all of their leaders had, but it is rare indeed.

Hans Rosling: Debunking Third-world Myths With The Best Stats You've Ever Seen

Speaker Hans Rosling is a medical doctor and statistician. He is co-founder and chairman of the Gapminder Foundation, which developed the Trendalyzer software system. Summary Hans taught Global Development' to Swedish undergraduates, finding they had preconceived ideas about statistics of Child Mortality after failing to predict which of 2 countries had worse child mortality.

Kevin Allocca: Why Videos Go Viral

Speaker Kevin Allocca is YouTube's trends manager. Summary Over 48hrs of video are uploaded every minute, and only a tiny fraction of a percent get more than 1 million views. Going viral requires 3 things Tastemakers influential people enjoying the video and reposting it Unexpectedness With so much video out there, the viral videos have to be different. Participation Others want to be a part of this, create parodies and meta-references.

Russell Foster: Why do we sleep?

Speaker Russell Foster Length 21 46 Summary Sleep is the single most important behavioral experience we have. But the perception and role of sleep in our society has shifted from importance to a waste of precious time. Shakespeare referred to sleep as nature's soft nurse , but Edison thought it was a heritage from our cave days. People often feel similarly to the latter, but it's usually because they don't understand the purpose of sleep.

Ben Goldacre: Battling Bad Science

Speaker Ben Goldacre is a physician, academic and science writer. As of 2014 he is a Wellcome research fellow in epidemiology at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine and a founder of the AllTrials campaign to require open science practices in clinical trials. Summary As an epidemiologist, Ben's job is to use evidence and science to decide what is good for the body.

How do you lift people up?

Even the best leaders can be overly critical, finding fault in their employees and allowing their own negativity to mask their best selves. Certainly, there is a place for criticism, but not without enough positive reinforcement to counter-balance it. I would call that being realistic . Why is this balance important to you as a leader Because you set the tone. Your employees are watching for cues on how they should behave, and if that tone is overly negative, it catches on like a virus.

Instead Of Manipulating Lifeless Pawns

In the game of power, you are surrounded by people who have absolutely no reason to help you unless it is in their interest to do so. And if you have nothing to offer their self-interest, you are likely to make them hostile, for they will see in you just one more competitor, one more waster of their time. Those that overcome this prevailing coldness are the ones who find the key that unlocks the stranger's heart and mind, seducing him into their corner, if necessary softening him up for a...

Sheena Iyengar: How To Make Choosing Easier

Speaker Sheena Iyengar is a Professor of Business in the Management Division at Columbia Business School and the Faculty Director of the Eugene Lang Entrepreneurship Center. She is known for her research on choice, culture, and innovation Summary The average American reports they make 70 decisions per day. A study was done by following CEOs around, and found they completed 139 tasks, and 50 of their decisions were made in 9 minutes or less. Only 9 of decisions took longer than an hour.

Hans Rosling And Osa Rosling: How Not To Be Ignorant About The World

Speaker Hans Rosling is a Swedish medical doctor, statistician and global health expert. Ola Rosling is the director and co-founder of the Gapminder Foundation (http www.gapminder.org). Summary Hans starts his presentation on ignorance by conducting a quick poll of the Ted audience. He asks a few multiple choice questions about trends across history.

The Enchanted Kettle

Fifty years ago, an old country doctor drove to town, hitched his horse, quietly slipped into a drug store by the back door, and began dickering with the young drug clerk. His mission was destined to yield great wealth to many people. It was destined to bring to the South the most far-flung benefit since the Civil War. For more than an hour, behind the prescription counter, the old doctor and the clerk talked in low tones. Then the doctor left. He went out to the buggy and brought back a large,...

Pia Mancini: How To Upgrade Democracy For The Internet Era

Speaker Using software to inspire public debate and enable voter engagement, Pia Mancini hopes to upgrade modern democracy in Argentina and beyond. Summary Democracy as a system is rooted in thinking and constraints from 500 years ago. Every few years it represents a few to make decisions on behalf of everyone else. It has high thresholds of entry you need either a lot of resources or to devote your life to politics.

Peter Doolittle: How your 'working memory' makes sense of the world

Speaker Peter Doolittle Length 9 30 Rating 2 5 Summary Your ability to solve problems is limited to your working memory' capacity to remember and think at the same time. The example was memorising 5 words and then doing maths problems, which most people failed. He gives some (very brief) hints on how to process things more accurately, and remember more including visualising more, and practising the things we're learning.

The neuroscience of asking insightful questions

When I get to the section on how to ask questions (an important part of learning to coach) I might ask a trick question to start off How many of you are good at solving problems . Without fail, almost all hands shoot enthusiastically into the air. There's nothing wrong with being good at problem solving. Except when it gets in the way of preventing the people you lead to learn and develop.

Joy Sun: Should You Donate Differently?

Speaker Joy Sun is a veteran aid worker and COO at http www.givedirectly.org Summary As an experienced aid worked, Joy often felt the urge to give money directly to the poor (rather than through programs). However, she believed that her programs would benefit them more by spending money for the poor rather than letting the poor spend money.

Paul Piff: Does Money Make You Mean?

Speaker Paul Piff studies how social hierarchy, inequality and emotion shape relations between individuals and groups. Summary Paul shows us footage of a psychological experiment a rigged 2 player monopoly game where they randomly pick one player to be more wealthy. The wealthy player starts with more money, gets double the income for passing GO, and moves more often.

Rory Sutherland: Life lessons of an Ad Man

Speaker Rory Sutherland Length 19 12 Summary The talk is focused around the value of intangibles, specifically from the perspective of advertising. He tells us that all value is subjective, BUT an intangible change can be just as satisfying as a physical change. Frederick the Great, of Prussia, wanted more the country to adopt potatoes as their primary crop. But people thought potatoes looked ugly, tasted weird, and farmers had no desire to grow them.

Seth Godin: How to get your ideas to spread

Speaker Seth Godin is an entrepreneur and blogger who thinks about the marketing of ideas in the digital age Summary For the first few years, the idea of sliced bread was a complete flop noone wanted it, and noone knew it was available. The original focus was on patents and factories the technical side of the idea, rather than the commercial. Nowadays it doesn't matter how good your idea (or product) is, it is only the most widely spread that win .

Naomi Oreskes: Why We Should Trust Scientists

Speaker Naomi Oreskes is an American historian of science. Summary We as a people have to answer questions that rely on the scientific method about global warming, evolution, and the effectiveness of vaccines. But increasingly, public opinion polls show that Americans don't believe the science on these issues.

Ruth Chang: How To Make Hard Choices

Speaker Ruth Chang is a professor of philosophy at Rutgers University. She is known for her research on the incommensurability of values and on practical reason and normativity. Summary Ruth discusses how to make hard choices between 2 jobs or partners, or whether to have children. In an easy choice one is better than the other. In a hard choice each choice has better qualities, but neither is clearly better.

The Six Instructions For Cosmic Ordering Every Person Must Read!

If there was a way for you to live your dreams and achieve all your goals through a process called cosmic ordering would you want to learn how you too could do this Imagine all your dreams can come true You can achieve great health Find your soul mate Gain financial freedom Have a fulfilling and meaningful life All you have to do is follow a set of instructions Would you do it I did When it comes down to it we are all here trying the best we can, with the awareness that we have at this moment...

Keep them from hitting a brick wall

Many organizations naturally hire people who are technically brilliant, skilled at their jobs, or extremely effective at getting results but may not be quite so effective with people. At some point, these very smart employees may be expected to lead others. The good news is that the skills needed to be effective with people can be learned. These very smart people need you to help them to learn how to interact with others in a way that produces the best outcomes.

Five Ways to Disarm an Angry Mob

Many years ago, as an inexperienced young woman working in corporate benefits, I did not have the skills to give a group of angry employees a presentation on a life insurance benefit that was changing. Since the plan changes had been many months in the making by a team I was leading, my knowledge of the plan was great, but my wisdom in dealing with other's reactions was limited.

Ten daily practices that show respect to your team

Disrespect seems to be running rampant everywhere, including our workplaces. Yet when a leader shows they respect their team, the benefits become obvious people are motivated, dedicated, loyal and the leader becomes a talent magnet the best workers want to work for and stay with that leader. All of those things make your life and leadership easier.

From doer-ship to leadership

Some of the most prevalent things I hear from the people who report directly to a leader is that they want to be more autonomous and be challenged in the work they do. And not surprisingly, they want to be acknowledged more frequently for what they are doing well. These are not unreasonable things to ask, yet they are often being withheld from highly capable employees.

Simon Sinek: Why Good Leaders Make You Feel Safe

Speaker Simon Sinek Simon is author of Start With Why How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action Summary Simon starts by discussing a medal of honour recipient a military man who charged into fire to pull wounded soldiers into a helicopter. In the military we give medals to people willing to sacrifice themselves to help others. However, in business we give bonuses to people who sacrifice others to help ourselves.

Dan Pink: The Puzzle Of Motivation

Speaker Dan Pink is the author of five books about business, work, and management that have sold two million copies worldwide Summary Dan Pink introduces The Candle Problem' attaching a candle to a wall with a box of thumbtacks and matches to that it doesn't drip. 2 groups try to solve the problem one is told they are timing to discover norms, while the other is given money if they are in the top 25 .

Daphne Bavelier: Your Brain On Video Games

Speaker Daphne Bavelier studies how the brain adapts to changes in experience, either by nature or by training Summary Fears over children playing video games is leveraged by the media for many headlines. While most children play games, most gamers are adults. Daphne is a brain scientist, so has studied the impact of video games on the brain. She notes that excessive gaming is hazardous to the health, but in reasonable levels is generally beneficial.

The El A Mecoeo Red Cloak

During the campaign of Cambyses in Egypt, a great many Greeks visited that country for one reason or another some, as was to be expected, for trade, some to serve in the army, others, no doubt, out of mere curiosity, to see what they could see. Amongst the sightseers was Aeaces's son Sylo-son, the exiled brother of Polycrates of Samos.

What Is the Difference between a Good and a Bad Habit

We do not have to label habits good or bad. Just accept them for what they are. Most people are well aware what any particular habit does to them or for them. In many cases we can become good at habits, but can eventually feel bad about them. They make us feel either better or worse than the person we want to be. Perhaps the difference between a good and a bad habit for each person is whether they want to go on doing it. A 'bad' habit, such as feeling stressed, might not in itself necessarily...

The 4 top productivity drivers

Productivity is always important, but it’s especially critical as the economy toughens. The 40 year-old Institute for Corporate Productivity (i4cp) is the world’s largest private network of corporations focused on improving workforce productivity.

Eccles Wigfield And Colleagues Expectancyvalue Model

Achievement Motivation Psychology

Eccles et al. (1983) developed an expectancy-value model of achievement choice as a framework for understanding early adolescents' and adolescents' performance and choice in the mathematics achievement domain. Figure 1 presents a recent version of the model. Eccles et al. (1983) proposed that children's achievement performance, persistence, and choice of achievement tasks are most directly predicted by their expectancies for success on those tasks and the subjective value they attach to success...

Why staying calm is important

As a new employee, relatively fresh out of college and working at a Fortune 100 company, I had some preconceived notions about how people would behave in a professional environment. I learned quickly that people are people and that my ideas about treating others with respect especially in the workplace weren't always top of mind for others. My cubicle was in the corner of a huge square space the size of warehouse filled with other cubicles.

Setting Your Intentions for Tough Conversations

One of the hallmarks of a great leader is their ability to truly see viewpoints other than their own. They may not agree with these viewpoints, but they can learn to understand them. Learning to understand is the first step toward resolution and reconciliation. It's unfortunate that many of us allow someone else's viewpoint (different from our own) to prevent a productive relationship that can ultimately benefit our organization or community.

How to behave like a leader

Many organizations espouse a set of leadership competencies lists of abilities or traits that their leaders and leaders-in-training need to get proficient at. These competencies are a great start to conversations that must be taken to become a good or great leader in any organization. However, they aren't always descriptive enough for leaders who want to improve themselves to know the actual tactical behaviors needed to hone their craft. Take Influencing others for example.

Now, Embrace Your Weaknesses

Thanks to the Gallup organization, hoards of leaders have been discovering and using their strengths. I really like that idea. Forgive me for being a wet blanket here, but it's unfortunate that this attention to strengths has had an (unintended ) consequence leaders, their organizations and coaches believe that by focusing on an individual's strengths, their weaknesses become irrelevant.

Pardon Me Your Ego is Showing

I watched a CNN show the other day where the news anchor rattled off the names of all of the recent indiscretions made by public leaders lately. Although I'd heard of all of them, over time, they became a little diluted in my mind. When I heard the anchor list them, I was shocked at the size of the list I realized that those are only some of the bad behaviors that leaders exhibit, since the list was limited by time ( recent ) and the term public leader . Ego has lots of meanings.

Meta Listening

It's hard to believe that an activity as simple as listening can be so difficult to do. And to listen beyond the words to listen at a meta level is even more difficult. The best leaders I've known have intentionally cultivated the skill of listening beyond the words to Understand others deep listening gets us out of our own way, and focuses our attention completely on the individual who is speaking and what they are expressing beyond the words.

Seven overused leadership strengths

Knowing your strengths allows you to capitalize on them, and use them to be a better leader. Who wouldn't want that Yet, there are strengths that can be overused. When that happens, they can undermine your best efforts at becoming a great leader. Through years of interviewing stakeholders and hundreds of leaders, I've gathered some information about some of the most common strengths that can be overused.

Why you should coach people

Organizations are increasingly teaching leaders to coach their subordinates (and sometimes each other). I want to believe that this isn't a passing fad, because there are lots of reasons for leaders to learn how to coach others in the workplace. To be clear, the real definition of coaching has little to do with what many think it is.

Michael Pritchard: How To Make Filthy Water Drinkable

Speaker Michael Pritchard is an inventor and entrepreneur the founder of LIFESAVER systems. Summary Half the people who drink unsafe water will suffer from diarrhea, and plenty of people die. In the aftermath of a major hurricane or tsunami the main focus is on restoring water, and building camps to provide it. Even during Hurricane Katrina in the USA, it took 5 days to get fresh water to the camps people were shooting each other to get water until then.

Chris Mcknett: The Investment Logic For Sustainability

Speaker Chris McKnett is a Vice President of ESG Investing at Boston-based State Street Global Advisors, the world's largest institutional investment manager Summary Sustainability is the investment logic looking at social, environmental and governance (ESG) issues. The main players to influence this are institutional investors, and Chris promises to prove sustainable investments are easy, and high performing.

Become a generative listener

There is a kind of non-listening that goes on in our society and organizations that is distracted and disjointed, and often marked by interruptions. This non-listening doesn't focus on the person speaking. Rather, the listeners try their hardest to get their ideas into the conversation. If you've experienced this, you know how frustrated you can be both as someone trying to be heard, as well as the listener who is trying to stay focused. Many of us don't know how to listen, or don't care.

Professional Action Plan Example

In all of it's glory, I've provided an example of a professional action plan that illustrates the previous three posts Ghoul or Goal, the Key to Your Action Plan Your Professional Development Action Plan Planning the Action Steps Deciding on Measures and Target Dates for your Professional Action Plan I apologize for the look of this action plan as my skills with WordPress are still evolving, and cutting and pasting tables wasn't working too well for me.

Guide to Handling Guilt and Self Punishment

Guilt is the source of much sorrow the driving force behind a constant mental whipping, a constant stinging. And from whom Who holds the whip What is one to do Is one helpless This series is not to say one should abandon all guidelines for behaviour, or that we should not follow our conscience. Reparations, the power to change and improve - these are all actions that are done best without the torment of self-imposed shame, and that is what the series aims to promote.

Blog Profits Blueprint - Make Money Blogging Plus, Me Vs. Yaro

Many of the people who read this blog are bloggers themselves. Some of them are running blogs that are much more successful than mine, but many of them are struggling to get off the ground. This is not unusual. In fact, less than 1 blog in 1,000 earns more than 20 a month . If you want some guidance on how to create a successful blog, I highly recommend the free ebook Blog Profits Blueprint by Yaro Starak.

Self Worth Theory

The basic perspective taken by our inquiries is that all achievement dynamics, including the valuing of intrinsic rewards, depend on a central, pervasive, and ongoing developmental need that involves establishing and maintaining a sense of personal worth. According to self-worth theory Covington, 1992, 1998 Covington amp Beery, 1976 , most students equate their sense of worth with the ability to achieve successfully. But the meaning and perceived role of ability in this equation can differ...

10 Reasons America Is Better Than Japan

Last time, we looked at 10 Reasons Japan Is Better Than America. But don't worry, the good ol' US of A still has plenty going for it. Let's look at 10 advantages of living in the land of the free and the home of the brave. 1. Credit cards . Visa it's everywhere you want to be except in Japan. With the exception of one major tourist trap (Kyoto Handicraft Center), I didn't see a single place in Kyoto or Tokyo that accepts credit cards.

The Construct of Interest

The term interest has been used in a variety of different ways. In everyday usage, interest almost always refers to positive feelings and is equally likely to refer to an attraction, a preference, or a passion (Valsiner, 1992). Among educational researchers, interest has had almost as many different meanings. For example, links between interest and more trait-like conceptualizations such as general curiosity (Ainley, 1987, 1993) or love of learning (Renninger et al., 2004) can be made.

Creative Visualization Notebook

It's a very good idea to start a notebook that can serve as your creative visualization workbook.* In this part of the book, I give you a number of written exercises and processes that you might want to do and keep in your notebook. You may wish to write down affirmations that you hear or think of, so that you can refer to them when you need them. There are many other creative ways to use your notebook, such as recording your dreams, goals, and fantasies, keeping a journal of your progress with...

Broadcasting And Receiving Station For Thought

MORE than twenty years ago, the author, working in conjunction with the late Dr. Alexander Graham Bell, and Dr. Elmer R. Gates, observed that every human brain is both a broadcasting and receiving station for the vibration of thought. Through the medium of the ether, in a fashion similar to that employed by the radio broadcasting principle, every human brain is capable of picking up vibrations of thought which are being released by other brains. In connection with the statement in the preceding...

Chakra Clearing … Re-energize and Balance Yourself in Twenty Minutes

Chakra clearing paves the way to opening your creative energy. Learn how to easily clear up what may be blocking you from success. Re-energize and balance yourself in twenty minutes. I want to share with you a process that will clear your chakras allowing you to get the most out of any chakra based meditation you may be doing. I discovered this technique a while back and was grateful I did. It gave me clarity about which of my chakras needed attention.

Surrender and Joy in the Pursuit of Excellence

There are many beliefs myths on the concepts of success and greatness and even around something as simple as making an honest living. For most of us, these revolve around struggle, competition and lack. It makes sense, then, that lack and struggle just make this earth a worse place for everyone living on it. I cannot say if these old beliefs are right or wrong they have been ingrained deeply in me as well but I have been considering an alternative, and I want to share my thoughts with you.

How to tap into the source of all creation

What does creativity mean to you To most people, they refer to the arts writing and music for example. But creativity applies to everything anything new, anything that has never been created before, stems from the creative faculty. What are your goals, your work, and your hobbies Can you see how creation plays a role in that Scientists, engineers they create things that have never been seen before. Fighters improvise in battle they moves in ways that he has never done before.

What your ego is and how to stop it from obscuring your inner peace and unconditional love

This is your consciousness and your awareness. It is beautiful, perfect, and peaceful. It is the I inside you, the I that controls your body, mind, and emotions. It is the true I am . It is what you were before life happened to you. This is what covers your inner peace. Your ego has stepped in, and life has left its scars. Your peace and your beauty have been obscured by countless scars - ugly marks that cover up your true consciousness.

How to see others as people

I spent much of the weekend reading a book called The Anatomy of Peace by the Arbinger Institute. It's been on my reading list for far too long. It continues the story of Lou who was featured in an earlier work by Arbinger called Leadership and Self Deception. Both books dig below the surface to explore the beliefs and mindset (that impact behavior) of a fictional leader.

A man's manual to being a manly man - Introduction: Being a prince

If a person has his sword out all the time, he is habitually swinging a naked blade people will not approach him and he will have no allies. If a sword is always sheathed, it will become rusty, the blade will dull, and people will think as much of its owner. There are two kinds of dispositions, inward and outward, and a person who is lacking in one or the other is worthless Excerpt from the Hagakure Book of the Samurai.

The elusive key to emotional mastery: Is it really that simple?

Let me steal and retell a little story from one of my favourite authors. Two ducks float peacefully along in their pond suddenly one crosses too far into the other duck's territory. A fight starts fast and furious. It lasts for only for a few seconds before just as suddenly they float off in their respective directions. As they do so, they flap their wings furiously, and then they return to their peaceful floating as if the fight never happened.

Fearless Questioning

In the climate of fear that exists in many organizations, we often hold back on asking the questions that need to be asked. We would rather be seen as having all the answers while we are afraid of losing our jobs, being stalled in our career, or simply looking ignorant. Yet one of the most effective actions you can take as a leader is to ask questions. I'm not talking about interrogation or the questions you already know the answers to.

How to make your own decisions

When I'm coaching a person, I will assist her in various ways paraphrase her, ask her questions, give her information, point out various aspects. But there is one thing I will not do, even though a lot of my clients would like me to I will not make decisions for them. In the end, it will be up to them to decide how to think, communicate and behave in various contexts.

Change Made Simple – Direct the Rider

Many real-world examples are provided.  In one case, a man named Jerry Sternin went to Vietnam to try and help address a decades long problem of malnutrition in children.  He had little time or resources to address what looked like an intractable problem with poverty and lack of education.  Those standard explanations were already in play and they were huge problems that would require massive expenditures of resources to even attempt to address.

Reconnecting with happiness

I've been thinking about happiness a lot lately. Changes in my personal situation and a dissatisfaction with what I've allowed to happen with my work forced me to take a look at my life. I decided to give something up so that I have space to pick up more happiness. It was a bold move, because there was a comfort in the work that didn't fulfill me but paid well. But I let it take over my life, and I no longer had the valued freedom that I had enjoyed . Don't get me wrong.

Nurturing the Irritant Into a Pearl

What if we saw those who irritate us as the beginning of creativity, collaboration, or even a thing of beauty a possibility yet to manifest itself with a little time and attention Consider the lowly oyster. When an aggravation is presented to its system it creates a lovely pearl, something of great potential and value. Here is an example of turning someone who irritates you into a valuable leader Fernando is responsible for a large organization in a global company.

When you want to know what others think

Photo credit 123RF You are a good leader. You feel like you've done your best to develop the relationships that will make your employees feel safe in speaking their truth. Imagine you are in a room for a team meeting to have a tough discussion about their performance, behavior, or a project that's going south. You ask for their thoughts on the situation. Crickets. Silence. The eyes in the room are focused everywhere but at you. You're disappointed.

Faith Is A State Of Mind Which May Be Induced By Autosuggestion

All down the ages, the religionists have admonished struggling humanity to have faith in this, that, and the other dogma or creed, but they have failed to tell people HOW to have faith. They have not stated that faith is a state of mind, and that it may be induced by self-suggestion. In language which any normal human being can understand, we will describe all that is known about the principle through which FAITH may be developed, where it does not already exist.

Say What You Mean & Mean What You Say

One of the most important skills for a leader to possess is the ability to communicate effectively and appropriately. We frequently think of communication skills from a public point of view:  a press conference, interview, or speech, but some of the most vital communication occurs on a daily basis – the communication between boss and employee, co-workers, family and friends.

Our Innate Innocence - Reflections on Forgiveness

An imaginary conversation on forgiveness what I had asked years ago, and the answers I have found since right or wrong, I do not know, but offered in the hopes someone somewhere might benefit. Forgiveness is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Why There is one thing I have realised. Our difficulties don't come from the act of forgiving itself. The difficulty comes from two things firstly, we don't know how.

Randy And His Wonderful Pauschisms

I got my first clue that Randy Pausch was a bit different when he got everyone on a first name basis, giving us all name tags and insisting that we simply call him Randy. I got my second clue when he said that he was giving away a giant stuffed bear to whoever did the best job on the first project. I got my third clue when he put on safety goggles and smashed a VCR with a sledgehammer. This all happened on the first day of class. That was 12 years ago.

Genuine Inquiry

The post earlier this week on the Art of Inquiry prompted a wonderful conversation in the comments and inspired some reflection on what it takes for a leader to adopt a way of being that supports asking questions in a genuine way. The Art of Inquiry only works when the questions are asked with authenticity.

Smashing Horizontal (And Vertical) Silos

More times than I can count I’ve seen the ideas of an engineer 1 or 2 discounted or ignored by the 3s and senior engineers—of course, that’s better than stealing them, although that happens, too. The attitude seems to be one of ‘your brain is incapable of any creative thinking until you are at least at my pay grade’, which is idiotic.

What is your living legacy?

There were three of us, good friends who were missing a fourth one. She had passed away several years ago, and for some reason we began to laugh as we told the quirkiest stories we could remember about her. She was, after all, a rather quirky person, and we loved that about her. She left behind some wonderful stories for us to remember about her we think she'd be proud of her legacy.

How to Moderate Subtle Intimidation

You are a leader who is skillful at creating and sustaining healthy workplace relationships. You don't use fear or threats to get what you want. Despite your skill, you may unknowingly intimidate others in a more subtle way. In fact, you are probably more intimidating than you think you are most leaders don't see it in themselves. It's important for you to be aware that others may be fearful of you simply because of the position you hold.

When Servant Leadership Goes Awry

The servant-leader is servant first It begins with the natural feeling that one wants to serve. Then conscious choice brings one to aspire to lead The leader-first and the servant-first are two extreme types. Between them there are shadings and blends that are part of the infinite variety of human nature. The difference manifests itself in the care taken by the servant-first to make sure that other people's highest priority needs are being served.

Providing Emotional Nourishment

There are realities we all share, regardless of our nationality, language or individual tastes. As we need food, so do we need emotional nourishment love, kindness, appreciation and support from others. J.Donald Walters When someone is a senior leader in an organization, you would expect that they know what they need to do, have the self confidence to understand when they are on the right path, and be perfectly independent, not requiring any sort of atta-boys or girls to sustain them.

Reflection in 15 Minutes with Bullet Points

I encourage my clients to find a way that works for them to reflect. This means setting aside some time to THINK. I get a lot of resistance, and understand that finding the time to reflect is difficult in their busy schedules. The thought of spending time alone can be tough too, considering most of them (like most leaders) are action-takers. The idea of being still to reflect can be a bit disconcerting it may not feel like anything is happening (but what if thought were considered action ).

My Philosophy For A Happy Life: Sam Berns

Speaker Sampson Berns (October 23, 1996 January 10, 2014) was an American who suffered from progeria and helped raise awareness about the disease.He was the subject of the HBO documentary Life According to Sam. Summary Sam Berns is a 17 year old highschooler with progeria. The rare disease, which has affected only 350 people worldwide, causes rapid aging, tight skin, and heart disease.

Step out of your comfort zone to develop trusting work relationships

We need leaders who are smart, get things done, AND connect and relate to the people who support them. Yet I often find that many leaders feel uncomfortable in relating to others in a way that moves their organization forward. So the mission(s) don't get accomplished while these leaders stay within their comfort zone- in their offices, managing people without connecting with them except to become overly involved in their daily work.

Six ways of being an approachable leader

Never underestimate how important being approachable is to the work that needs to be done in your organization. When you are approachable, people can connect and relate to you. They understand what is needed for success and are willing to roll up their sleeves to get the work done. When others feel that you are open to hearing what they have to say, they will keep you apprised of the things you need to know.

How to have conversations like a jazz musician

Winton Marsalis has said that the best listener in an improvisational jazz session often ends up contributing the most to the music because they are able to play off whatever is being offered by the other musicians. And so it could be with the conversations you have within your organization. How often have you been in a meeting where everyone is vying for attention and waiting for their turn to speak The dialog is disjointed, with disparate pieces of information coming in from all sides.

The Opposite of Striving

For months, this leader has experienced a flow of ease, a state that is spiritual and freeing. She doesn't need to strive to do anything and yet all the best happens around her exactly as it should, with ease. Although her hours at work are long, she doesn't suffer, nor does her family in her absence. The time she spends with them is joyous and fulfilling. She is in a state of grace. I see it sometimes grace bestowed on a leader who is following the path that is true and just.

Five ways for leaders to orchestrate better team relationships

You believe you're a good leader because you delegate, develop, and encourage others. You hire good people with great skills who know what needs to be done. The work gets completed on time and within budget. But something is missing. It's quiet out there where they do their work (physically nearby and virtually). And it's quiet in here in your office. Your team doesn't interact with others on the team and they don't come in to ask for your guidance.

Coaching vs. Feedback

So often coaching is used as a buzz term for almost any kind of interaction in the workplace (and everywhere else. Who would have thought there would be such a thing as a knitting coach ). The term has been confused, misused, misunderstood and blasphemed. This is unfortunate, because coaching is a powerful skill for leaders to have in their tool kit. Yet, coaching is hot everywhere, and especially in the workplace.