Archive for July, 2009
Helping Your Followers to Stay Grounded
July 29th, 2009 | 
Author: Several years ago my then-teenaged daughter had to have major surgery for scoliosis. With a severe curve in her spine, her rib cage was in danger of damaging her lungs. The surgery required cutting her entire back open and placing rods and hooks along her spine to keep it from curving further.
She also had a past history of grand mal epileptic seizures. The surgeon was concerned that she might seize on the operating table, so he planned to have a neurologist on hand during the surgery.
Worry and Speculation Can Hijack Us
My worry about my daughter’s upcoming procedure overwhelmed me. I was unable to focus or concentrate on much else in the weeks leading up to the surgery. I tried to find perspective – there are worse things that could happen to a child than this kind of surgery, after all. I tried to focus on the positive: my daughter was smart, spirited, active, and normally healthy otherwise.
My mind kept going to the worst thing that could happen. Until….
Shocked Into Reality
During the weeks leading up to the surgery, a friend at work lost her daughter to sudden illness. She was the same age as my daughter. It was a horrible, horrible shock and loss for my friend, her family, and for those of us around her. It was the saddest thing imaginable.
The loss of this vibrant young woman grounded me in the reality of my own situation. My daughter was still with us, and the surgery she was scheduled for would assure that she would remain healthy. Worrying about what might happen wasn’t doing anyone any good; I was literally shocked back into a focus on the present.
What This Has to Do With Leadership
During these tough times, I see some leaders getting caught up in conversations about what “might” happen. Speculating about the worst thing that can happen in their organizations isn’t helping anyone.
Especially now, a leader’s responsibility is to keep people focused on the reality of the present. They must avoid and re-direct the negative conversations about what might happen.
There is no better time than now to get out of your office, communicate reality and truth with people. Put an end to rumor and speculation. And since fearful employees may not hear the message the first time, you will need to communicate it over and over again.
Help your followers to stay grounded during these tough times.
P.S. My daughter’s reality? Since her successful surgery, she has traveled the world, is a graduate student, is physically active as a dancer in a ballet company, and recently married a great son-in-law. She is an inspiration, and in her own way, a great leader.
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When Being Carnac Doesn't Work For You
Johnny Carson’s “Carnac the Magnificent” was one of best known and loved comic characters on television. I loved watching the Johnny Carson Show, but especially loved this persona.
Carnac was all-knowing and had the answers to anything, even before hearing the question. If he didn’t have the answer, he made it up. To the best of my knowledge, he never admitted to not knowing an answer.
When was the last time that you were willing to admit, to yourself or others, that you just didn’t know something; that you weren’t so certain after all?
Leaders who “go with their gut” and shun the advice of others to achieve huge success make great stories for Hollywood. I’m the first to admit that there is value in going with the gut at the right times. However, I also have a gut feeling that many leadership failures can also be attributed to hanging on to certainty – insisting that he or she knows what is right, to the point of not listening to those who know more.
One of the most important things a leader can do is to know when to set aside “certainty” and to be open to the ideas of others.
When to set “knowing” aside:
- In a crisis: Perhaps like the one we’re in right now. When complexity and urgency meet, you must open up to the ideas of others. Not only will this bring a balanced perspective, but it may also bring the answers you seek.
- When something big needs to be strategized: The truth is, you just cannot strategize the big things (well) yourself. Trusted advisors and mentors must be included and listened to in order to design the best “something big”.
- When others will eventually need to be involved in the event, project, or initiative: They want to be a part of it. Set aside your need to know and listen and incorporate others ideas as you are conceptualizing the initiative. This is key to engaging them in the work to follow.
When we’re sure that we’re the “smartest person in the room”, our ability to learn from others stops. Worse yet, others stop engaging us in dialog that may illuminate a problem or foster a new idea. This is where mistakes and failure take root. We cannot lead alone, and part of the art of great leadership includes inviting the discomfort of letting go of our own certainty.
Book Review: The Upside of the Downturn by Geoff Colvin
After reading Colvin’s book, Talent is Overrated, I became an instant fan of this author (I never read “How the Mighty Fall”). The talent issue resonated so much with me due to the work I do. When the publisher offered send a copy of The Upside of the Downturn without asking me to review it, I jumped at the chance to read it without strings attached, even though I knew it would be a different type of book than the one I’d read previously.
It’s worth noting that fellow blogger and online friend Wally Bock is quoted in this section, stating that during a time of layoffs, survivors “will certainly experience some grief. They may also still fear the loss of their own job.” As someone who went through several rounds of layoffs in a previous life, this is true, and a good reason to avoid layoffs if you can.
- Stand up and be seen. People want to be led. And in a crisis, they are looking for someone to ease fear. They want to know that someone is working on the problems.
- Be calm and in control. This helps to ease fear and keep everyone else calm and on track.
- Be decisive. Often, decisions that weren’t made when things were good can be made in a crisis because people understand better how important they are.
- Show fearlessness. Show others that you are not afraid. Several CEO’s have bought their company stock in this recession.
- Explain the crisis in a larger context. How people are affected by stress is related to how they see it. This helps people to respond in a more productive way.
Hmmm…..take the word “crisis” out of the elements in the list above, and you have a pretty good partial list of things a leader should be doing all the time.
Since this is not the last recession we’ll experience, read the book and keep it on your shelf for the next time around. If you are a seasoned leader looking for innovative and new strategies, you won’t find them here. Overall, I found this a good read with a sound (if not new) backbone of advice that can be used in good times, too.
Intentional Leadership Post Named in Wally Bock's Top Five This Week
Wally Bock, consultant, writer, speaker and of the well respected Wally Bock’s Three Star Leadership Blog, selects five top independent business blogs to feature that week. Intentional Leadership is honored to be among a bunch of top blogs this week. Check it out at his “Midweek Look at the Independent Business Blogs”. There is some wonderful, thought-provoking reading here.
Try "Shut Up and Listen" Meetings
I hope I’ll be forgiven if I re-post an earlier favorite from my column, slightly rewritten. Many of you have not seen it, I’m sure. An important blogging consultant (who shall remain nameless) told me re-posting this wasn’t cheating 
– MJA
Copyright Business Review West Michigan by Mary Jo Asmus. Used with permission.
Many leaders are terrible listeners. However, very few of them are self-aware enough to realize it.
Generally, the poor listening skills I see in one-on-one meetings with my executive clients is played out in the workplace, and it can have significant consequences. Poor listening can be a career killer for a leader.
A few days ago, I took a call from a mid-level leader in a large company who was interviewing me to be her executive coach. In a half-hour interview, she talked for 25 minutes and I talked for about five. I typically do a lot of listening in my work, so I don’t usually mind not talking. However, in this case she was supposed to be interviewing me. Also, she would ask a question and then cut me off by talking over me.
Based on that experience, I can predict that others will also have observed that she doesn’t listen well. Her employees and manager are frustrated about it and may even have told her about it, but she didn’t listen. If so, this is probably creating all kinds of problems for her. She isn’t hearing important information she requires to make the best decisions, develop the best relationships and lead others in a way that makes them feel engaged and motivated. Like many leaders, she may feel she needs to have all the answers and is quick to let everyone know about the vast amount of knowledge she has.
This person has the opportunity to be an incredible leader if she can change this bad habit of not listening. If she chooses to work with me, and if I’m right about her poor listening skills in the workplace, I may prescribe regular “shut up and listen” meetings for her — meetings where she will consciously and deliberately practice listening skills and dial down her talking skills. (Postscript: I didn’t get the work, but not surprising since I never really got interviewed by her).
If you suspect that you are a poor listener:
?€¢ Request feedback from others and/or hire an executive coach who can collect feedback for you. If you are highly self-aware, you may be able to observe and assess your own listening skills.
?€¢ If you are a poor listener, take action now to correct it. It may derail you later if you don’t.
?€¢ Become intentional about shut-up-and-listen meetings. These could be one-on-one meetings or larger meetings which you lead or participate in. Jot down a few open-ended questions before or during upcoming meetings to be used instead of talking throughout the meeting.Those questions will help you focus, listen without distraction and will keep the dialogue moving.
?€¢ Ask your questions, but then shut up and listen.Continue this practice. If you are purposeful about listening for a few months, it will become a new, ingrained behavior. And the results with your boss, your team and others around you will be nothing short of amazing.
Shut up and listen. So simple, so effective. Yet so hard to do.
The Secret Responsibilities of a Leader
We all know about the usual list of responsibilities for a leader: develop a vision, motivate others, etc.
There are some responsibilities a leader must embrace in order to be the best at their craft that we don`t normally talk about, at least in this way. They may be discussed behind closed doors with a confidante or coach, but they are not usually on a list of goals or part of performance review discussions. It is rare that they would be part of a conversation with a leader`s boss. They are, after all, considered “soft”. They are also essential.
1. Develop others: it is rare for a leader to be held accountable for developing their employees. Even rarer is a requirement to develop their peers, their boss, their suppliers, etc. When you take the responsibility for developing everyone around you, you do the right thing for your organization and the people in it. Think beyond developing your employees ?€“ what would it mean to develop your boss? Your peers? (Yes, it is possible).
2. Promote a sense of community: When people in organizations are engaged with those around them, the creative thinking, motivation, and (not coincidentally) productivity increase. We are social creatures. We desire and need to connect with each other to be the best we can be. Your responsibility, as a leader, is to foster connectivity in order to create community. What actions can you take today to do this?
3. Assure inclusion: This duty goes hand in hand with promoting community, but it requires a bit more vigilance. What are you doing to assure that those who may feel left out are included in your community? Look around you for the quiet ones. Make sure they feel a part of the group and what is going on.
4. Celebrate successes and failures: Both are important, contrary to what is normally done in our organizations. Successes are rarely acknowledged from a celebratory standpoint. Start now. Failures are learning opportunities, so why not be grateful and celebrate what has been learned? A celebration can be large or small ?€“ it just needs to be done. What haven`t you celebrated with your team lately?
5. Let go and let the people around you do their best work: There is a lot of trust in being a leader. This means that you need to let them do the work in the way that makes sense for them. You are responsible for inspiring them, helping them to become motivated. What will it take for you to let go of the need to impose your way on what others are doing?
I`m certain this small list is only the beginning. What other secret responsibilities does a leader have?
Stop Greasing that Revolving Door
A recent conversation with an acquaintance unveiled a story of a steady stream of lawyers and other employees who’d left a well-known patent law firm he worked in. Managers at this organization were technically competent, but didn’t know how to manage people well. We’ll call this law firm “The Firm”. Apparently, The Firm didn’t treat employees well (an understatement, by the way). Employees didn’t stay there very long (also an understatement).
Many of The Firm’s employees were extremely talented. When they left, many of them took their business clients to the new Firms that hired them (and the new firms treated them well).
We all know organizations with a revolving door. Many of them, like The Firm, are very good at treating employees very badly. Even in these tough times, keeping talented people is essential to staying sustainable as an organization. Coming out of the recession ready to build and grow will require lots of talent.
The leaders at The Firm (and other companies like The Firm) may not care that many of their employees are talented enough to find a job elsewhere. However, if they think about it, it might be more important to them that these employees often have great relationships with their customers, and losing customers costs Firms lots of money. Many customers are willing to work with those wonderful employees no matter what firm they work at.
Could there possibly be a better bottom-line reason for being kind to employees? I don’t think so. Because:
- treating your employees well will help you to retain your customers: Customers may already be wondering about your revolving door. When that talented employee that they value leaves your firm, they’ll know the truth – and they follow them to the new firm!
- sustaining and growing your business can only happen when people are treated well: Many organizations are focused solely on the bottom line, losing sight of the fact that good employees are responsible for sustainable financial success and growth. Those good employees are most productive when they are treated well. Disengaged employees cost money. Better for your firm if your talented employees are engaged right where they are rather than with a competitor.
- it costs money to fire and hire: This is not news, but do the math anyway. You might be surprised and even scared silly.
- Losing a talented employee and a good customer is a double whammy. You’ve lost your talented employee to a new firm as well as a good customer . And you’ve also lost a good customer. This has become a doubly-expensive loss
So stop greasing that revolving door. Treat your employees with respect . Value the talent you have. Fire or coach the managers who are technically competent but poor at working with people. And then breathe a sigh of relief that you and your firm will be around for a good, long time.
Hello, I'm Here to Change You
Helpful suggestions from others about what we should do to change our behavior aren`t always, well, helpful. This is especially true when they come to us unsolicited.
Many leaders have a compulsion to let people know what they are doing wrong and how they need to change to do things “right.” It is this striving to change others that gives performance evaluation a bad rap. Just the word “evaluation” shifts our anxiety into overdrive. Most of us don`t want to be evaluated; we prefer that a leader assist us with our own development.
As a leader, you may have found that telling others what they need to do to change doesn`t seem to generate loyal followers. In fact, when this unsolicited helpfulness becomes a regular habit, you might find people running the other way when they see you.
Okay, so your intentions are pure. You want to be helpful to someone, a good performer, who needs a little guidance. But intention is only part of the equation, and you may actually be weakening their ability to change themselves. Owning the power to change ourselves is much more energizing than having someone else try to change us. In fact, telling someone to change their behavior can be perceived as a threat and it shuts down their motivation to change. This leaves all kinds of human potential on the table.
So what`s a leader to do? Try coaching instead. Learning coaching skills has become a regular requirement for management in organizations. This skill set provides a means to catalyze individual development, including personal ownership of professional change.
Like many things in leadership, coaching skills are relatively simple. They are, however, often difficult to put into practice.
When I ask my clients if they know how to tell people what to do, they nod their heads enthusiastically, proud of the fact that they`ve mastered this skill. I admit this is a trick question. I know that many leaders haven`t mastered the skills of asking great questions and really listening.
Asking and listening are at the heart of coaching others. When these skills are first practiced, you may be surprised at how difficult they are, yet how effective they can be.
Asking and listening tools must be a part of your toolbox if you expect your followers to become whole, independent, empowered and incredibly effective. A great question, when asked strategically, can provide the fuel for enormous change within an individual. Great listening allows a follower to “think out loud” and it is a sign that you care (reminiscent of the saying, “People don`t care how much you know until you show how much you care”).
The days of telling people what to do are coming to an end. Leaders are discovering that they can`t change others; they can only change their approach to them. When you learn to listen and ask, you may find your frustrations with striving to change others have also come to an end.
What Workplace Freedoms Do Employees Want?
- The right to do their best work with guidance but without interference: most employees appreciate being provided general direction in their work, with the ability to figure out how to get it done. Without micromanaging. This shows you value their work, and when it is completed well, can become a catalyst for pride and their development.
- The right to provide their opinions without ramifications: your employees often just want to be heard. Accepting their opinions (without necessarily agreeing with them) is the first step in having dialog that will help you ?€“ and them ?€“ to grow.
- The right to contribute to the organization: Like you, employees want to feel like they are part of something bigger. To feel significant and as if they are making a difference in the organization. Supporting them in finding ways help them contribute is one of the most important things you can do.
- The right to be accepted for who they are and to work within their strengths: When you support people in working within their strengths, you`ll help them to do the best job possible for you and the organization as well.
Now that I`ve completed the list, I`m willing to bet that it might be similar to a list that you would put together if you were asked this question. What would you add?
Great Reading at Great Leadership
Dan McCarthy over at Great Leadership writes a heck of a blog. But he also is generous in showcasing the writings from other bloggers in the leadership development arena. For a bit of an extension to your Independence Day weekend, check out the fireworks at the July Leadership Development Carnival at his site.
Thanks Dan, f0r hosting this carnival and bringing us some new ideas every month. I look forward to being the host for the August Leadership Development Carnival!
